“Ndandinabahlobo ababini ababethanda ukwenza izinto kunye, kodwa bangandifaki mna. Ndandisoloko ndisiva indlela ababonwabe ngayo. Ngenye imini ndafowunela umhlobo wam, yathi yakubanjwa ndeva ngencoko nangentsini ukuba bahleli kunye ibe bonwabile. Ndathi ndakuva indlela abonwabe ngayo satsho sandibhuqa isithukuthezi!”—UMaria. *

Wakha waziva unesithukuthezi ngathi abanye abakufuni? Ukuba kunjalo, iBhayibhile ingakunceda. Kodwa ke makhe siqale sithethe ngezinto ezimbalwa ofanele uzazi ngesithukuthezi.

Phantse wonke umntu ukhe abe nesithukuthezi. Le nto iyenzeka nakubantu ababonakala beneetshomi ezininzi. Ngoba? Kaloku eyona nto ibalulekileyo ngabahlobo bokwenene kungekhona inani leetshomi. Umntu usenokubonakala eneetshomi ezininzi kodwa zibe zingengabo abahlobo bokwenene, aze ke abe nesithukuthezi.

Isithukuthezi sinokuba yingozi kwimpilo yakho. Iingcali ezafunda iziphumo zophando olwenziwa kayi-148 zafumanisa ukuba isithukuthezi sinokumbulala ngaphambi kwexesha umntu, ibe “siyingozi ngaphezu kokutyeba kakhulu” kwaye “sifana nqwa nokutshaya iientyi eziyi-15 ngosuku.”

Isithukuthezi singakufaka engxakini. Sinokukwenza utshomane naye nabani na ofike kuqala. Omnye umfana onguAlan uthi: “Xa unesithukuthezi unokukhangela nabani na onokukuhoya. Usenokuphela usiba yitshomi yakhe nabani na kuba nje ungafuni ukungabi natshomi, kwaye loo nto inokukufaka engxakini.”

Ukuncokola kwi-intanethi akusoloko kusisusa isithukuthezi. Intwazana enguNatalie ithi, “Sisenokukuthi mbende isiyali enoba ungancokola nabantu abalikhulu ngosuku nge-sms okanye ngeimeyili.” NoTyler uyamngqinela. Uthi: “Ukuncokola nge-sms kufana nokutya izimuncumuncu, ukanti ukuncokola nomntu umbona kufana nokutya ukutya. Nokuba izimuncumuncu zingamnandi, kodwa kukutya okuhluthisayo.”

Zicingele kakuhle iitshomi zakho. Ngokomzekelo, masithi ubona iitshomi zakho zikunye ezifotweni kwiWebhsayithi yokuncokola, ube wena ungamenywanga. Xa kunjalo usenokukhetha ukucinga ukuba ushiywe ngabom, okanye ucinge ngesizathu esibhetele. Yintoni ekwenza ubacingele kakubi abany’ abantwana kodwa awuzazi izizathu zabo? Kunokuba ubacingele kakubi, kungcono ukhangele isizathu esibhetele sokuba bekushiyile. Isithukuthezi sidla ngokwenziwa yindlela ozibona ngayo izinto, kungekhona kuba uye washiywa.—Umgaqo weBhayibhile: IMizekeliso 15:15.

Sukuzibaxa izinto. Xa ubhuqwa sisithukuthezi usenokumane usithi, ‘Mna ndihlala ndingamenywa’ okanye ‘Andifunwa mna ngabantu.’ Ezo ngcinga ziya kukuzisela nje umvandedwa. Iingcinga ezinjalo ziya kukwenza uxhentse ndaweni nye: Uba nesithukuthezi, nto leyo ekwenza ube yinkom’ edla yodwa, uzibone unesiyali, suke ucinge ukuba awufunwa ngabanye.—Umgaqo weBhayibhile: IMizekeliso 18:1.

Zama ukuhlobana nabantu abadala kunawe. IBhayibhile isixelela ngetyendyana lomfana uDavide, elatshomana noYonatan owayelishiya ngeminyaka eyi-30 yonke. Nakuba babeshiyana ngeminyaka engako, babengumtya nethunga. (1 Samuweli 18:1) Nawe unganabo ubuhlobo obunje. UKiara oyintwazana eneminyaka eyi-21 uthi: “Kutsha nje ndiye ndaqaphela indlela okundinceda ngayo ukuba neetshomi ezindala kunam. Ezinye zezona tshomi ndizithandayo zindala kakhulu kunam, ibe iyandichaza indlela ezicinga neziphila ngayo.”—Umgaqo weBhayibhile: Yobhi 12:12.

Kuvuyele ukukhe ube wedwa. Abanye abantu baba nesithukuthezi noba bahleli bodwa ixeshana nje elifutshane. Kodwa akunyanzelekanga ukuba kube njalo. Ngokomzekelo, uYesu wayekuthanda ukuba phakathi kwabantu, kodwa wayekuvuyela nokukhe abe yedwa. (Mateyu 14:23; Marko 1:35) Nawe kanti ungalivuyela ixesha lakho. Endaweni yokuba nesithukuthezi xa uhleli wedwa, elo xesha usenokulisebenzisela ukucinga ngeentsikelelo ozifumanayo. Loo nto ingakwenza ube ngumhlobo othandeka nangakumbi.—IMizekeliso 13:20.